Twerking Must Be STOPPED!

Twerking has been around for a long time. It originated in New Orleans in the early 90's. Although I don't remember twerking that early on, I remember the twerk teams on youtube back in high school and how it was only within the Hip Hop/black community. I even remember the Ying Yang twins' "Whistle While You Twurk" song back in 2000.

So why all the commotion about twerking in 2013? Miley Cyrus made it mainstream by posting some wack video of her twerking even though she was hardly doing any twerking at all. Now everybody think it's cool and even white people hopped on the bandwagon. Miley feels as if she's the queen of twerk using a thick black girl as a prop in her VMAs performance which I as a black woman found very degrading.

At first I could tolerate it, I even twerk in the mirror by myself or with my friends in the comfort of my own home. But I see girls and boys posting videos on vine, youtube and instagram for attention. Where are their minds at? There is a website that collects all the videos of girls twerking all over the US and I'm positive that a huge percentage of these girls are under the age of 18. The comments for these videos are just sick, twerking must be stopped! 

Now I can't even talk to a guy without out them asking me if I can twerk. What used to be a ratchet and disgusting act to plenty of people has now become a household name. Although I find nothing wrong with the dance, why can't we twerk in moderation? Why do we have to prove to everybody that we can clap our butt cheeks? It has become an addiction to many and it must be stopped.

Watch this video and share with everyone you know so we can come together and #stoptwerking

Why Do They Call it a Crush?

The first time we hooked up I told him I didn't want a relationship, I just thought okay this dude is going to be wack. He agreed to date casually, so we just been having sex and although the sex is great theres more about him. I'm not sure if it's his zodiac sign or something but he's very kind by nature.

His hugs make me melt inside. The first time I hugged him I melted, it made me weak, a damn hug (It's about to get heavy). 

He's a gentleman, he definitely had a good upbringing.

He looks at me with kind eyes but sometimes his eyes gets intense and he looks at me like he wants to devour me, and I. love. that. shit. 

He has a sense of humor, he's intelligent and we also have a lot in common. 

Okay Nola he's the perfect package, gentlemen but a freak in the sheets, isn't that what you wanted? 

Only problem is that he is nowhere near close feeling the way I feel and it's been messing me up.  I tried to express my feelings and it's either he knows and is pretending to be 
clueless so I can stay around, or he has no idea. Even my girl walked me through getting to talk to him on a serious note, and he just doesn't get it!

So theres this lovely eclectic guy by the name of Mojeaux Discothèque aka Mojo Disco (google him). He's a NYC Socialite known for his 
paint and poetry events in Brooklyn. He has a Q&A thing he does on his facebook and thought I 
should seek some advice from a male's perspective. He really did open my eyes to the truth to the mind of a man and I have 

a different outlook. Here it is..

Q: Haay, lol so I have the biggest crush on a guy that I've been dating casually. I went into our relationship wanting no more than sex but I feel differently now. It's not so simple though because he will not open up to me when I try to get to know him. I think about him too much and it drives me crazy, because he’s a bit of an ass hole. How should I go about telling him how I feel? Should I be straight forward? Should I tell him in person? I feel like a raging hormonal 16 year old, Help??

A: That is a consequence of giving your goods before giving your heart. It just makes everything a challenge for you. As men, once we feel we have obtained what we wanted, no more effort(or even thought) goes into it. Most of the time we're already thinking about the next conquer. What you did in reality is help to propel his closed complex forward. If anything, you can tell him that you no longer want to engage in sex until you can get into his heart. That challenge will either send him running, or force him to face his demons. Either way, it's his choice to make at this point in the game.

Although it wasn't what I wanted to hear, he spoke the truth. 

Why do they call it a crush?
Because thats how you feel when they don't feel the same way in return.

Why I Never Dated Outside My Race and Why I'm Going To Change That

 (via pintrest)

I always wondered why I never dated outside my race or at least talk to someone of a different background. I really thought I was prejudice but then I thought of all the guys that weren't black that I had a crush on throughout my life.

My first crush was Shane, he was Middle Eastern but I wasn't sure what country exactly. We were in the 4th grade and he always used to make me laugh. I felt so special because I was the only girl he talked to, most of the girls were stuck up. We'd sit on the floor in the classroom during free time and do weird stuff with our voices and put our knees under our shirts to make boobies. I never smiled with a boy before, I was so used to crying around them from being teased and tormented. I knew he was my friend.

Then one day I had this feeling come over me and I knew I didn't just like him, I liked him liked him (if you watched Hey Arnold you know what I mean haha). So one day we were on the floor joking around talking as usual and one of my friends who I secretly hated came up to us and said "You know she has a crush on you Shane." I gave her a "are you crazy" look and looked at Shane feeling so embarrassed. He looked at me and looked down. He looked upset as his cheeks turned red. "Tashana has a crush on Shaaaane." She sang with an evil grin. I wanted to fight her at that moment but I didnt want to get in trouble besides,  I always knew she was jealous of our friendship. After that day we never talked again, then I guessed he moved or whatever.

For some reason outside of my race I always had a crush on someone and they would like me too but it was always so uncomfortable. I went to a school where everyone was segregated by race and if you weren't a black male somebody was going to give you problems.

Going into college it was still natural to date "my own kind" and as relationships passed, I lost interest. I wanted to date outside my race but I didnt know how to go about it. It seemed as if dating black men were just easier.  You have the Asian's who have a different cultures and customs, and as much as I love what's different, dating on the other hand wouldn't be as good if the family is not accepting. Then you have the Caucasians and that's pretty self explanatory, and its not all about racism, they just don't know what they do sometimes especially in California.

Now I'm in New York and I've been trying to step out of my comfort circle which is a lot easier being that the city is a huge melting pot.I'm not saying I'm through with black men, I'm just expanding my options.

Have you ever dated outside your race? Would you say it's different? What are your thoughts on interracial love

Food For Thought

(via Pintrest)

Feel Good Music: Blu & Exile - Dancing in the Rain

Song is super old but it's golden, pretty much sums up a lot of our lives. Enjoy.

Amanda Bynes' Possible Traumatic Childhood?

We all know Amanda Bynes has been all over the news and magazines with her latest acts of odd behavior. Some glorify her others are annoyed by it believing that she is doing it all for attention. But the issue is rooted deeper. Two weeks ago authorities placed her on 5150 psych hold after she allegedly started a fire in the driveway of a home near her parents' house in Thousand Oaks, Calif. Her strange behavior has been going on for years, and it just gotten worse through time. "People close to Bynes are convinced she's suffering from mental illness, specifically schizophrenia." Child stars are commonly known for mental illnesses, specifically females like Lindsey Lohan and Britney Spears for example. Who knows what goes on behind closed doors in entertainment but it is more than the whole transition from a child to an adult in the business. I can't confirm this but I believe that Disney, Nickelodeon and other children entertainment business are filled with perverted sexual acts, trauma and mind control to these child actors. More so for children who grew up in the industry. People don't want to believe it but this has been happening and still is. Even more disappointing is the parents of the child who is very money hungry and allows their own child to spiral out of control, like Drew Barrymore for example. When put in the spotlight at a young age it is a lot of pressure and most definitely detrimental to their mental health. This is just common sense though. I highly doubt anyone would want to be put in a negative light. Britney Spears maybe didnt have a picture perfect life as it seems once she started her career at the Mickey Mouse club. This is a very sick world we live in.

I looked further into mental illness linked to abuse and I came across this site http://vigilantcitizen.com/ . It mainly talks about conspiracies and illuminati in the media and history, but I came across this very disturbing story about an artist with 13 personas, her name is Kim Noble. Faced with mind control trauma since she was 2, she has over 13 alter personas who don't know each other but they all paint, each unique in its own. She was diagnosed DID and MPD (dissociative identity disorder and multiple personality disorder)  

“Kim Noble  is a  woman who, from the age of 14 years, spent 20 years in and out of hospital until she made contact with Dr Valerie Sinason and Dr Rob Hale at the Tavistock and Portman Clinics.  In 1995 she began therapy and was diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder (originally named multiple personality disorder). D.I.D is a creative way to cope with unbearable pain. The main personality splits into several parts with dissociative or amnesic barriers between them. It is a controversial disorder but Kim has had extensive tests over 2 years by leading psychology professor at UCL, John Morton, who has established there is no memory between the personalities and that she has the misfortune of representing the British gold standard over genuine dissociation.

Having no formal art training, Kim and 13 of her personalities (alters) became interested in painting in 2004 after spending a short time with an art therapist. These 12 artists each have their own distinctive style, colours and themes, ranging from solitary desert scenes to sea scenes to abstracts, collages, and paintings with traumatic content. Many alters are unaware that they share a body with other artists.

What is remarkable to all is both the quality of their work and the speed of their progress. Within five years of starting to paint they have already had seventeen successful solo exhibitions and participated in an equal number of group exhibitions. Kim was also the first Artist in Residence at Springfield University Hospital in Tooting, South West London.”
- kimnoble.com

Check out a run down of her art work. (viewers discretion!)
http://vigilantcitizen.com/vigilantreport/the-world-of-mind-control-through-the-eyes-of-an-artist-with-13-alter-personas/


Check out the oprah interviews and her website.
http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/Art-Therapy-and-Dissociative-Identity-Disorder-Video
http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/Kim-Nobles-Judy-Personality-Video
http://www.kimnoble.com/


Could it be that Amanda Bynes isn't hungry for attention? We have to acknowledge all the possibilities and hope that she recovers as well as seek professional help to get to the root of her problem.

Pursuit of Happiness

They say the best things in life are free, and I couldn't agree with them more. How can I find myself when were trapped in a society where were told what to do. How can I be free when I'm a slave to money. How can I pursue happiness when I'm persuaded to do what it takes to live the American dream. What a damn facade America is. Where we are constantly spending money we don't have to be in debt til death do us part. Not me. I don't want to care about possessions, I've learned through time to be happy without them and as time progresses I've become more dependent on striving to make my spirit happy rather than turning to material things as a form of therapy. Granted, I get sad when I can't afford to buy nice clothes or get my hair done, but I know it is apart of my transformation to becoming the someone that I can't even fathom of being. And the people who I attract in my life to come will be nothing short of amazing and fill my heart with joy and light. I know that for a fact.

As go to work everyday, I feel empty inside as I refill shelves, ring up customers and clean up after them too. It's a constant battle to go to work almost every day, and I really can't wrap my mind around why. Of course everyone goes through this, we all work for corporate America, but I have no idea why I cannot deal. I often compromise not being able to pay rent next week everytime I call out and to be honest, I don't care. I told my friend that I want become the first black woman hitchhiker that I know. Although I was joking, there was some truth in it. Although they make no money, they seem to be the happiest people I've ever seen. I heard some stories about people who are homeless by choice and they too are happy. Not saying I want to drop everything I have and all that I've known to become one with the earth. I just want a part of it, a little piece of true freedom that has been stolen by our culture.

This morning my friend Sheldon and I went on a mini adventure to Williamsburg at the very edge of brooklyn where you can see the Manhattan Bridge. Although it was overcast, it was beautiful. The water crashing on the sand was calming as the warm breeze blew through my body. It was very therapeutic aside from all the chaos NYC has to offer. I loved it.

Natural Hair? I'm Over It.

Well not necessarily. I'm not going to go run to a relaxer kit, I'm just not with the epidemic of achieving a big beautiful afro or thick luscious curls. Natural hair has literally been a big ordeal for kinky and curly haired women everywhere and it was liberating at first. It was all about loving our hair and not conforming to what the media portrays as "beautiful", and it is still that way but now I'm not so sure for me personally, I'm just not feeling it anymore. My 3 years of worrying about my hair came to a halt 5 months ago when I went through a long and bad breakup. I was following my regimen and wearing protective styles then all of a sudden my hair broke off and created a huge bald spot in the back of my hair. Thanks stress! I opt to putting marley twists in my hair and I've had the same marley twists for 6 months straight of course with maintenance. The only products I use daily is a scalp vitamin tonic spray I got from the vitamin shoppe and shea butter. I also take fish oil, hair skin and nails and biotin although I haven't been consistent with it lately. I felt like for 3 years I catered to my hair, watched the youtube videos, read the blog posts, joined the forums, followed the challenges in hopes I can grow thick hair like the beautiful people I see on the internet. Now I'm so over it. Hair is hair. I realized that I need simplicity and what they do for their hair may not work for me and it's okay, but man I was obsessed! I was jealous that my hair couldn't curl like her's and my fro wasn't as full and thick like her's, which was pure insanity! I spent so much time googling the best product for twist outs, scalp moisturizers, leave in conditioners, shampoos and anti frizz creams. You'd see me in target reading all the product labels, comparing prices and talking to fellow naturalistas about what styling cream is better for my hair type, over it! My hair is bipolar and it doesn't need my extra time and attention (that is what created breakage). My nappy ass kinky hair needs hardly any attention and that is why I'm looking forward to locking my hair when it grows back. It's either I lock it or go bald and bald is not for me haha. As much as I love my hair, I just want to be to be free'd of the responsibility of it.

Feel Good Music : Stacy Barthe - Flawed Beautiful People

The Photographer Amateur

I've always loved photography. My dad majored in photography and although I wasn't around him as much I always knew that he was passionate about photography. When I'd visit him in New York, I got to do photo shoots growing up. He'd dress me up in straw hats and feathered boas, hang a fabric up in his apartment, set up his equipment and shoot away. It was a fun experience and I learned a lot from him. Now he's a respiratory therapist living in Seattle with his wife and two little beautiful babies. One day I hope he gets to do what he loves again. There is no doubt that I picked up a love of photography from him. Here's some photography I took on my iphone on the Brooklyn Bridge with my friend Scotty.

Subway Encounter 2

An older black man came up to me at broadway junction while I was reading. "Did I bother you with my loud talking on the train," he said in a catty tone. I looked up from my book and replied "yea, but I was able to tune you out."  I knew he was trying to start a conversation with me. "You know, I never seen a tall young woman carry herself the way you do." He tried to explain how I look intelligent and not a lot of black people know how to read. Of course I wasn't impressed with that remark. "It's because I carry a book, I'm intelligent," I replied. He got stumped and then tried to compliment me. He basically said I look smart but he couldn't elaborate when I said why. "I have a big forehead?" I said with a frown. He disagreed and quickly changed the topic since that conversation was obviously going nowhere.

He asked me my age and I told him 21. He looked down nodding his head as his eyebrows furrowed together as if he was thinking hard about something. He said he's a comedian then refused to make me laugh without charging me 5 dollars. I looked at him and shrugged, but this stranger did not give up. He then gets into talking about comedians like Kevin Hart who used his tough life to make people laugh. That's what he wanted to do. He loved making people laugh, but for a price I presume. Then out of the blue he jumps into a Martin impersonation which made me laugh hysterically. Suddenly I was interested in this 36 year old man. He messed all that up when he said he has "a lot" of girlfriends. I looked at him blankly waiting for a reason as to why he brought that up. 

Then a concerned look appeared on his face and he motioned his hands in a way explaining that he was not trying to hit on me. We exchanged questioning looks and leaned back at the same time. The fact we acted the same way, had us laughing so hard we took a couple of steps away from each other cracking up. I then knew he could be a good friend regardless of his age or demeanor. He told me little about his life, his name and email in which I don't remember neither of them. But I hope to see him around sometime. Although I was late to work, he truly made my day in the subway station that day. 

Subway Encounter

To get to work I take the subway. Almost everyday I hop on the j to the c to get to my destination. Right when I get off at broadway junction I get a guy or a couple guys doing some sus stuff. Like the other day this guy said in my ear "you're too pretty to be looking down" Done scared me out of my mind! I didn't even turn my head to glance at whomever said that, I just winced at the creepiness I just had experienced. This black man failed to think that I could be looking down for a moment to watch my step. What do these guys think, I got low self esteem. No negro, my esteem is far from that. Nonetheless I keep moving and let the voice that came from his creepy little mouth drift from my mind. It's so funny how strangers feel like they know you. Anyways, f**k them. :)

No Boobs? No Problem: Fashion Tips & A Confidence Boost

If you're flat chested I know you're asking "God, why have you made me flat chested". Not being able to fill out your low tops are the worst. Being with guys who tell you that your chest looks like a little girl’s is even more worse. Yes you can get breast implants but you and I both know we don't have money for that. But don't lose hope, here are some ways to flatter what's lack thereof. No pun intended.

Horizontal stripes are my best friend. It creates an illusion of bigger boobs. You can wear more attention grabbing tops too like glitter for example on a night out.

Wear higher necklines  That's pretty self explanatory. You have nothing to show so yep. You can still be sexy with a high neckline.

If you have a wide chest, no boobs like yours truly, stay away from low scoop tops and v necks, it makes your chest appear big and boobs small.

Aside from tops you can always wear padded bras. Victoria’s secret has the best push up bras for $60. Target carries super padded bras like VS but there no more than $15. You can even try water bras. Water bras freak me out just because I think they might leak but I had a friend who was transgender back in high school and of course he had no boobs but they made it look pretty realistic.

Aside from figuring out what you wear, don't feel so bad about your itty bitties. There's plenty upsides of having a small chest.
1. We don't have to worry about saggy boobs and stretch marks in the future. This is a huge win.
2. No heaviness and bad backs. Girls with big boobs always complain about how heavy they are. Psh. Okay, I guess I understand.
3. We don't get negative attention from pigs(guys). I appreciate the guys who are attracted to a pretty face and a nice personality.
4. We don't have to wear bras, and we can do more activities.

So in the end small boobies are a beautiful thing. Be proud of them, name them, push them up or let them free. It's your confidence that makes them sexy.

Have them saying damn girl that thang looking squeeky: what you need to know about your woman parts

Vaginas are the best! But they can be very bad when not taken care of properly. It's up to you to do that, so if you want a happy vagina the following are great tips for maintaining that.

Be really familiar with what your vagina does and when it does it. It's yours, you should know everything about it.

If anything is abnormal especially after sex, protected or not, First thing you should be doing is calling your GYN. Googling can help give you a general idea what might be going on down there but there are numerous factors as to why your vagina might be acting up.

When keeping the vulva clean please wash front to back, never back to front, ever! That can introduce bacteria.

When it comes to products, stay away from scented soaps, sprays etc. Your vagina shouldn't smell like tropical rain, fresh meadows none of that. Although that would be nice that's not what God intended. So guys need to shut up talking about her pussy needs to smell like roses. No. Sit. down.

When comes to douching I suggest not doing that. I don't know why they sell douches til this day because your vagina is a self cleaning organism. Douching can eliminate the good germs and we want the good stuff. 

Really simple. Remember your vagina is something to be taken care of. Viva la vulva!

Lost of words at first sight.

So today while I was at work working on my reshop there was a deep velvety voice that approached me."Hello?" Feeling a bit irritated with the amount of work I had to complete I looked up, but before I could look at his face, I saw his necklace of a wooden lion which matched his brown long sleeve shirt. He was tall dark and handsome. His hair curly his skin smooth like milk chocolate. His frames hid most of his face but I knew he was beautiful. "Where is the restroom?" He asked kindly. My mouth literally hung open as I analyzed every detail of him in admiration. Seconds passed until I was able to say, "if you go down and make a left, um it's going to be where the um check out lanes are." As I stared at him through his glasses, he replied "Ok, thank you" as he grabbed his cart and walked away. I shook myself back to reality and went back to work. Minutes passed and he was back to ask me "where are your empty spray bottles?" and flashed a quick smile, I think I melted inside but this time I made sure I was quicker on my feet. "Make a left at the pharmacy and its going to be on the right at the end of the isle." He said thank you again and left. I immediately got back to work. Couple mins past again and as I was stocking some items I saw him again but he just walked past my isle and he just looked at me, then he was gone. That time around it stuck. This whole day I couldn't stop thinking about him and the more I think about what happened the harder my stomach butterflies flutter. All I know is that my job did some major cock blocking today. I hope he decides to stalk me. Lol

Single forever.

Newly single, I’ve been mainly focused on working and just doing me, you know, taking things slow. Being that us ladies are young, it doesn't come hard meeting new people especially w. things like social networking, going out, school, etc...I find myself trying to dodge a bullet. So I compiled a list of things females can do to stay single. This is vital for all the single ladies who don't want a ring on it!

1. Never wear makeup! I haven't been wearing makeup lately unless it was for a job interview. Show off that discoloring skin and pimples. If you have flawless skin, I don't know what to tell you.

2. Dress with no intentions to impress. Please don't show your face with stains and holes in your clothes, just effortlessly. We all know we dress to impress so No impressing!

3. Focus on school or work.

4. Accept that being single is good for you right now. Don't lay in your bed one night feeling lonely and call up your ex saying you miss him! Don't play games!

5. Don't show your "sexiness" on Facebook,Tumblr, Instagram, Twitter, none that! You expressed that your single, someone gonna want to try to get to know you a little better after they see that cleavage and that booty sitting on the bathroom sink. (For those who do that weird shit haha)

6. If you want to have "relations" do it like a dude. Nothing's wrong with a casual sex, as long as you can handle your emotions. Don't get emotionally attached and use a condom or you will be sorry!

Follow these guidelines and you'll be single for ever!

Being a Tall Black Woman

Everywhere I go Im criticized. Little kids drop their jaws and stare at me with their eyes wide open. I was always taller than most kids throughout my life but I wasn't tall. It all hit me in the 8th grade. My mom took me to my doctor concerned with my new found growth. The growth pains were the worst. My knees would creak and throb in PE class and I had to skip out on certain exercises. It made me feel awkward. My insecurities led to a lot of bullying from other kids. I was the tall awkward girl in school as I had to wear high waters jeans because I grew out of my clothes to fast. By the time I was a freshman in high school I was 5'9. Fortunately I had friends with the other tall girls and it made me being me a lot more comfortable. I still dealt with bullies(aka immature boys). I was told that my feet were big, I was dark skinned, I was too tall,I had nappy hair, I was skinny. The older I got the more comfortable it was to date. Once I was in college it was nothing but tall men galore! No longer did I have to deal with boys making fun of my height.


Now I'm 21 and I can proudly say that I'm not embarrassed of my height anymore. I'm unique and I love it. One thing I learned is how to deal with people who are insensitive and often jealous. The spotlight is on me all the time. I get the "woah your tall!" the "you should model." And "Do you play basketball?" I usually just go with the conversation because they don't understand how repetitive they are. At times when I don't want to be bothered I just smile and nod even when that person comes off as insulting. Being tall requires a lot of confidence and thick skin. Being anything of a minority requires the same thing as well. So whatever you are whether your extra tall or short, confidence is key. Laugh at yourself sometimes, it's okay to have a lil humor about the way you look. It shows confidence and people won't use what they may not like against you. Ever since I moved to NY, I haven't been getting the whole tall girl look. That's because New Yorkers don't really care for the most part. One of the main reasons why I love the city, we can all be and express ourselves.


Shani.

21 and broke

Where is the financial stability? The comfort in living? That job that I talked about previously, is gone. It was a 3 week job. Bitches be trippin. How were they not going to tell me that it was a 3 week temp job. I thought I was gonna be there til April. So I'm open for any job I don't care what it is, I'm desperate. As long as it falls within morality. I'm not going to become a skripper.

Life in NY has been pretty unstable financially and I should've known this. It is the city and those who move and survive are those who

1. Have very supportive parents
2. Moved for their career
3. Get paid to go to school

I don't fall in any of those categories. Although my mom gives me food and gas money and I'm on my fathers phone plan. It's nothing compared to the kids who get money for rent and other expenses monthly. Don't get me wrong, I'm so thankful for parents who want to see me succeed but at the same time they don't want to see comfortable to the point where I rely on them for money. It's very understandable.

I've been here for 9 months and its been a whirl wind of struggling. J and I are strong and we'll keep riding til we can't no more. We're thinking about moving to Connecticut if we can't find a stable job here soon. He knows people who can get me a job immediately and his parents live there so I'm looking seriously into it. I'm really looking for some where where I can be stable to go back to school. Quite frankly New York just ain't it. Will I be saying bye to the big apple? Only time will tell.

Shani.

When you have a lazy boyfriend: How to deal with domestic equality

Old school people said you shouldn't live with your boyfriend/girlfriend before marriage. I beg to differ! After a few months of dating I decided to move in a new place with J. He was the motive that I moved from Virginia to New York. But he's so lazy and Unfortunately I'm a little OCD. I like things to be organized and clean as much as possible. Him? Not so much, and its become one of my biggest pet peeves. I often have to clean after him and tell him what to do. It constantly leads to arguments. It's so annoying that he thinks he's in the right and he doesn't do anything because I nag him, but is it my fault that I'm fed up. I refuse to think so. I’ve never got the notion that he’s sexist because he knows that I’m very independent. It’s not 1940. We argued til I said I shouldn't care anymore. He agreed since he always likes to have the last word. So for now I'm going to not give 2 fucks about our space and see how he keeps up. Let the petty games begin. But I still need to know how to get him to change.

Do you guys ever had to deal with a lazy boyfriend? How do you deal with domestic equality?

Death to the Air Mattress

I feel like the Jefferson's. J and I got to break in the New Year with a new mattress and other items from Ikea  We went from sharing a twin air mattress to a queen air mattress to a QUEEN MATTRESS with new sheets and all. No more worrying about air leaks anymore. Before we know it we'll be out of this basement in no time...


Dear average New Yorker,
How do you do it? With your $1000 studio apartment in Brooklyn and expensive ass college tuition. How can you tolerate the hustle of finding a job? How can you walk every where in the hot, sticky, humidity summers and the bone chilling cold winter? How can you deal with the crowds and all the unfriendly people. I admire you for it but New York has become overrated for me. But I decided to move here so I have to embrace the struggle...

January squat challenge

It's a little late in the challenge but it's never to late to get that booty looking right for the new year.

Apartments: New York style.

Isn't this what every minimalist New Yorker wants? Clean, well lit, and fresh, Love it!

2013: starting off the new year right.

Happy new year! I hope you all celebrated with your loved ones. J and I decided to stay clear of the city and went to Forrest hills at a fusion lounge called Jade.

We had raw Salmon! I'm not a big fan to be honest, I'm open to new things just as long as I'm not throwing up the next day. The unagi roll was by far the best, it's eel but it was cooked and you can't even tell that there's eel in the roll.

It was really loud in the restaurant, I couldn't hear my voice but I got used to it. Once the drinks set in I didn't pay attention anyways. It was lovely and I had my first New Years kiss. It was something to remember.

Who is Nola Darling?

She is the name of my alter ego. Originally a girl from spike lee's first film She's Gotta Have It, she was romantically involved with three men who wanted her badly. I cant relate to that personally but she didn't want to be tied down, she was confident, she was successful and most importantly she was a Brooklyn girl. My Nola D is 21, with kinky hair, brown skin to match her almond eyes, full lips and a statuesque body. Aside from her effortless style, she's still trying to figure out her place in this world. She's a hustler yet graceful. She classy and sexual. This my personal/lifestyle blog. I just love to write about everything and what better way to express my thoughts than a blog. Welcome.