I always wondered why I never dated outside my race or at least talk to someone of a different background. I really thought I was prejudice but then I thought of all the guys that weren't black that I had a crush on throughout my life.
My first crush was Shane, he was Middle Eastern but I wasn't sure what country exactly. We were in the 4th grade and he always used to make me laugh. I felt so special because I was the only girl he talked to, most of the girls were stuck up. We'd sit on the floor in the classroom during free time and do weird stuff with our voices and put our knees under our shirts to make boobies. I never smiled with a boy before, I was so used to crying around them from being teased and tormented. I knew he was my friend.
Then one day I had this feeling come over me and I knew I didn't just like him, I liked him liked him (if you watched Hey Arnold you know what I mean haha). So one day we were on the floor joking around talking as usual and one of my friends who I secretly hated came up to us and said "You know she has a crush on you Shane." I gave her a "are you crazy" look and looked at Shane feeling so embarrassed. He looked at me and looked down. He looked upset as his cheeks turned red. "Tashana has a crush on Shaaaane." She sang with an evil grin. I wanted to fight her at that moment but I didnt want to get in trouble besides, I always knew she was jealous of our friendship. After that day we never talked again, then I guessed he moved or whatever.
For some reason outside of my race I always had a crush on someone and they would like me too but it was always so uncomfortable. I went to a school where everyone was segregated by race and if you weren't a black male somebody was going to give you problems.
Going into college it was still natural to date "my own kind" and as relationships passed, I lost interest. I wanted to date outside my race but I didnt know how to go about it. It seemed as if dating black men were just easier. You have the Asian's who have a different cultures and customs, and as much as I love what's different, dating on the other hand wouldn't be as good if the family is not accepting. Then you have the Caucasians and that's pretty self explanatory, and its not all about racism, they just don't know what they do sometimes especially in California.
Now I'm in New York and I've been trying to step out of my comfort circle which is a lot easier being that the city is a huge melting pot.I'm not saying I'm through with black men, I'm just expanding my options.
Have you ever dated outside your race? Would you say it's different? What are your thoughts on interracial love